subtext

Fri, 05 May 2006 01:44:52 GMT

i have this now.

http://amywanders.blogspot.com/

also, i do read people's stuff here still. quite frequently. especially samantha's. hi samantha.

just when you think you've heard it all in relation to walmart...

Sat, 07 Jan 2006 15:17:56 GMT

this made my morning.

Wal-Mart web site makes racial connections
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10736265/

"When visitors to Walmart.com requested Planet of the Apes: The Complete TV Series on DVD, four other movies were recommended under the heading Similar Items. Those films included Martin Luther King: I Have A Dream/Assassination of MLK and Unforgivable Blackness: The Rise and Fall of Jack Johnson."

retriever staff, here is your article

Mon, 12 Dec 2005 00:06:26 GMT

Caramella206 (6:55:36 PM): i have to finish this article
egyptian karim (6:56:16 PM): anything i can help with?
Caramella206 (6:57:59 PM): yes it's about,
egyptian karim (6:58:58 PM): it's about commas?
Caramella206 (6:59:35 PM): haha, a town hall meeting,
Caramella206 (6:59:39 PM): in which they discussed the middle states report on the improvement / changes of umbc
egyptian karim (7:00:02 PM): i'll write it in news format
egyptian karim (7:01:05 PM): recently there have been many changes at umbc. some of them improvements, some of them horrible news-worthy type losses.
egyptian karim (7:01:11 PM): [paragraph break]
egyptian karim (7:01:38 PM): the town hall meeting discussed these things at length, yet managed to accomplish nothing.
egyptian karim (7:01:43 PM): [paragraph break]
egyptian karim (7:02:01 PM): the middle
egyptian karim (7:02:07 PM): [paragraph break]
egyptian karim (7:02:14 PM): states were also discussed
egyptian karim (7:02:26 PM): I'm AMY!
egyptian karim (7:02:30 PM): the end

oh brother...

Mon, 05 Dec 2005 21:27:11 GMT

Dear Santa...

Dear Santa,

This year I've been busy!

Last Sunday I gave alittledark a wet willie, then I took it back (-5 points). Last Friday I helped woodenhalf hide a body (-173 points). Last Tuesday I gave change to a homeless guy (19 points). In August I bought porn for me_and_gravity (10 points). In May I caught a purse-snatcher who stole prittybutterfly's purse (30 points).

Overall, I've been naughty (-119 points). For Christmas I deserve a rough spanking!

Sincerely,
caramelangel

brandon dudley kills happy babies

Fri, 18 Nov 2005 01:17:38 GMT

brandon, you are never invited to a retriever meeting again. see, figure 1:

figure 1:

SPiffyest: HOW WAS YOUR DINNER LAME LIKE BRANDON
SPiffyest: i am so mad at joe for bringing that bad man to the office
Caramella206: i told him he dashed my dreams of becoming a real person someday
Caramella206: now i'm just a shell
SPiffyest: YOU ARE A REAL PERSON TO ME

see brandon. sarah is awesome and YOU are in grayscale and your photos suck and you're WEAK and YOUR LIFE STORY IS BORING.

i'm just kidding i love you thanks for the harry potter tickets see you tomorrow bye

it made me want to cry

Sun, 30 Oct 2005 21:43:20 GMT

shawn and i had just finished our marine corps marathon 8k in d.c., and we were watching the marathoners cross the finish line. an older guy in the gold wave (started at 8:45) was coming up at the finish line in less than three hours, and with like .1 of a mile left, he just fell to the ground. just collapsed, holding his quadricep, obviously in agonizing pain. he was on the ground for just a few seconds, halfway between kneeling and completely sprawled out, looking ahead of him as if he was contemplating crawling to the finish line, when everyone started cheering incredibly loud for him to get up, he was almost there. but what i thought was amazing was someone in the scarlet wave (started at 8:15) who didn't know him stopped and helped him up, sacrificing his own time to help someone he didn't even know off the ground so he could finish his marathon. and, he did it.

light

Fri, 21 Oct 2005 15:29:57 GMT

bad night. one sentence.

Fri, 14 Oct 2005 05:42:18 GMT

at one point tonight, an incident began with my shoe flying off on charles street and ended with a bloody injury on my arm, to which aged burning cream was applied due to a lack of better-suited medical ointments, causing my red-speckled tricep to in fact "burn" all night long as i worked for five hours only to make $37; as my night came to an end and i attempted to drive a co-worker home, he, albeit accidentally, smashed my side door into a very high curb, seating himself with the comment, "nothing a little paint job can't fix..."

Sun, 09 Oct 2005 06:06:26 GMT

does anyone have any dead keys i could have/borrow? keys you don't use anymore, any keys at all! or keys you don't need for like two weeks and i can give them back to you! please, it's for a strange english project...

Caramella206: my teacher is going to access my project through a lock box of keys, WITH a key
Caramella206: i'm going to drop the lock box in front of her office
egyptian karim: see i'd be arrested for something like that
egyptian karim: as an arab i leave no unattended packages anywhere

oh simple things

Fri, 30 Sep 2005 20:26:45 GMT

i have this thing where i drive to baltimore and i imediately get into this excellent mood. i get to work and i am in my prime. any desire i have for doing costly things such as going out at night to an expensive restaurant, or bar, or club, is completely taken care of when i simply have to go to work. i get free food, free drinks, i laugh. god, i laughed a lot last night. i meet people. and then i dance when everyone starts going on the dance floor to the incredibly loud and tempting indian music.

i express my extreme horror at artwork they put in there for an art show that doesn't go with the ambience at all, and the other employees attempt to "hold me back" from the artist when he shows up as i try and determine whether this painting is of a cow, a bull, a unicorn, or a horse, or perhaps a combination of them all. then i realize that since the animal has a gaping hole in the middle of its body where there is a landscape and clouds inside, it doesn't really matter - it's god awful. and then i go home with money and feel like i went out to baltimore for the night and had a great time.

weakness

Wed, 28 Sep 2005 21:23:33 GMT

i could get high off of reading beauty. i read something and it hits me so intensely, i want to throw my body on the floor and envelop myself in it, and roll around intoxicated from words.

what is wrong with me?

the ivory to my ebony key

Wed, 28 Sep 2005 21:03:52 GMT

People talking were meant to look at a face, the disastrous cupcake of it, the hide-and-seek of the heart dashing across.
-- "Starving Again," Lorrie Moore

writing long papers again

Tue, 27 Sep 2005 03:29:57 GMT

i would just like to say that i was having major anxiety about writing this 10-page paper and was seriously considering dropping this class because i felt like i didn't have enough resources to write about my topic and came up with a multitude of other excuses as well.

and then i called shawn and whined to him and he said that i needed to sit down and write it and graduate and succeed in life and now he's making me do it and therefore he's a horrible, horrible boyfriend. just awful.

I'M RICH COME ROB ME

Mon, 26 Sep 2005 12:36:59 GMT

i somehow came into money two days ago. zeeba finally paid me a hefty check when i went in there before going to work at red maple and confronted kris about it. he wrote me a check on the spot with a "no problem!" wave of the hand and a, "i won't even take out any taxes!" i.e. "please don't cause a scene because i haven't paid you in over two months and never had any intention of doing so."

then i made $52 an hour at red maple in 5 and a half hours (yes i averaged my tips into an hourly wage, and no, we're not hiring, go away), and that was pretty cool. and during the day i did a book promotion with shawn at the national book festival in d.c. for four hours which gave us some decent money.

but it was great because what i *really* got to do was watch the anti-war march and feel the energy and look at all the cool signs. our favorite was held by an adorable elderly man: "proud of my son [insert big picture of son's face]. ashamed of this war."

notes

Tue, 20 Sep 2005 17:09:28 GMT

shawn and i moved into our new place this weekend. to put it mildly, it was hell. ask brandy for details, as she kindly listens to me complain in the office.

the place itself is nice. brand new carpeting, massive space, two bedrooms, etc. but, there are bugs. i came home from work saturday night at 2am, turned on the kitchen light, and they all went running. i grabbed a paper towel and killed them all, and left the dead bodies there all kill-bill style, all TELL YOUR BRETHREN TO LEAVE HERE style.

i don't think it worked.

---

on work, i love it. red maple on charles street in baltimore. i get dressed to go there and i feel like i'm getting dressed up to go out. i'm there and i have a great time. i work two days a week, i make a lot of money, and when i don't, i enjoy myself so much that i don't even care.

a new girl started bartending the other week, and my co-worker chris was telling her to turn the candles so the labels face in. so, the rules = it's fine if we get wasted at work, but don't let anybody see the labels on the candles.

---

i need an intellectual partner. someone to come with me and go back and forth with me about random stuff in coffee shops. i need stimulation, because i'm doing it myself lately and that makes me feel solidified.

---

i think about romantic relationships in terms of self-preservation way too often.

zeeba is going down

Thu, 08 Sep 2005 18:07:19 GMT

so, i realized that zeeba owed me money a long time ago. and i let it go, pretty much, just occasionally calling my ex-manager (not tamer, who doesn't work there anymore, but the one kris, who i never ever saw and who now has all tamer's stuff/info/work hours of the employees). left kris just two messages over a three-week period, saying that could he call me and can i pick up my check and does he have it, blahblah. never picked up his phone, never called me back.

well today i decided to do my own calculations and figure out just how much money zeeba owes me.

$505 dollars.

and woah, let me just tell you that if there's one skill i've learned from my mother, it is harrassment via phone calls. i will be calling zeeba every single fucking night until they give me my money, and they will learn to not withhold over $500 from the daughter of kathleen segreti ever, ever again.

apple ipod nano

Thu, 08 Sep 2005 02:22:05 GMT

new kind of ipod, just announced. i want!

http://www.apple.com/ipodnano/

just typing

Wed, 07 Sep 2005 03:20:54 GMT

i have an apartment in greenbelt! is greenbelt ghetto? i hope not. it seems kind of ghetto... then again $899 for a two-bedroom with 3 huge walk-in closets, so close to a d.c. metro station, isn't bad. tis one exit away! and i love d.c.! and the metro! and and apartment is 39 mins from baltimore and 29 mins from umbc! a little far, but, it's a great location.

we move in sept. 17. one-year lease.
gah!

suffocation

Tue, 30 Aug 2005 03:53:10 GMT

the part of me that is ripe has been aching all day. i spent an hour feeling the juices, kneading at the skin, practically clawing, trying to get rid of the ache. tenderness did not suffice. i tried to find with my fingers the core, the plum part of me i could rub out, to numb me, to release. but i grew tired. and now there will be flies, and stillness.

Mon, 29 Aug 2005 13:01:07 GMT

"The town was newly built, or rebuilt, on the flat floor of a seven-thousand-foot-high valley; it would soon bore Lo, I hoped, and we would spin on to California, to the Mexican border, to mythical bays, saguaro deserts, fatamorganas... Why did I hope we would be happy abroad? A change of environment is the traditional fallacy upon which doomed loves, and lungs, rely."

- Lolita, Nabokov

a phone call from abby at 9:15am

Tue, 23 Aug 2005 13:49:04 GMT

"your mom just called me and woke me up and started yelling at me. she didn't even say hello, she just launched into yelling. so i told her to never call me again and hung up on her. oh, and she said she was going to get the police to come after you and then they were going to come after me and my family, which i found hilarious"

good times.

mommy dearest -- part 20395749057

Sat, 06 Aug 2005 03:01:18 GMT

so my mom went crazy and called verizon and got every single phone number i've called in the past two months, and then proceeded to call and harrass them. she found abby's family's number (the ones who live in florida), and called them too. she ended up talking to joey, abby's little brother and the most awesome 16-year old i know.

and, this was said:

HoCaesarSpeaks (10:59:09 PM): your mom told me she isn't paying for your car anymore
Caramella206 (10:59:14 PM): she's lying
Caramella206 (10:59:23 PM): she says stuff like that all the time
HoCaesarSpeaks (10:59:35 PM): and that you were responsible for the holocaust

running in san francisco

Mon, 01 Aug 2005 05:25:19 GMT

my run this morning was amazing. cool, breezy, along the embarcadero overlooking the golden gate bridge. hearing everyone cheer for the marathon runners finishing in two hours, and for the heavier woman i spotted walking as fast as she could in the back of the 5k -- people still cheered like they were both equal olympic medal winners. the high was ridiculous. i was incredibly pumped after my run, thinking i could do more. and then i took pictures, and stood in awe of the marathon finishers, thinking how much effort they put into training, how much this mattered to them if this was their first one, or how much this had become part of their lives if this was their hundredth (and yes, it was some people's hundredth marathon).

then, met up with abby (who will be with me for the next three nights) after i walked from washington and embarcadero to mission and 5th street (if you live in san francisco, you know how far this is). we went into the city, to the jazz festival in north beach (same one as yesterday, except today it was hideous gospel and not jazz at all), then to caffe trieste, of course, for lattes. then i went to city lights bookstore.

attention retriever members. you will not believe who i saw in city lights bookstore on the jack keroauc level.
christopher corbett.
it was very jarring seeing someone out of element like that. but, nice. apparently, he's vacationing in san francisco the same time i am.

then, more walking, nice little indian place with abby, dinner for 7 bucks a piece (oh how i shall love being able to split dinner prices now). then, much-needed laundry doing and relaxing reading on my bed with abby.

bed soon. exhausted. alcatraz tomorrow?

cafes and running

Sun, 31 Jul 2005 05:13:27 GMT

today: went to the embarcadero, where all the piers are, in quest of free produce and organic goods at the farmer's market. found, instead, the san francisco marathon runner's expo -- where i needed to go anyway, to pick up my stuff for the race tomorrow. went inside, was very pleased to find that they were giving out free food (organic apples, carrots, hummus, power bars of various questionable substances, etc.) and got a shirt, cap and poster. satisfied after gathering up my lunch for the day, i then went to the hyatt regency's garden room to hear "meet the penguin," a talk by this guy who used to be like 300 pounds and used to drink and smoke, and then one day decided he wanted to run marathons. funny guy. he said he only focuses on finishing them, never a certain time. that asking for anything more than finishing is greedy. coaches come up to him and tell him they'll train him for free, and he says no, because he has a terrific job doing horrible (i.e. motivating people to do marathons for fun not competition), and if he did mediocre, he wouldn't have a job anymore.

then went back to caffe trieste since there was supposed to be music. no such luck, but met a guy (a fellow lone reader / coffee drinker) who told me of the north beach jazz festival. went over there with him, chatted, had a good time. he left, and then i laid in the grass in the surprisingly hot sun and listened to jazz and read lolita, because i should apparently just move inside of a book because that's where i'm happiest. then i went to a place called 'the stinking rose' for dinner where i was infused with garlic spices, then back to the caffe for more reading/caffeine and chatted with another guy, this one a runner in tomorrow's race as well.

tonight, sleep, must wake up early (6am) to figure out how i can get to said race, as buses will stop working because 15,000 people are running tomorrow... and need breakfast, somewhere, because hostel only starts serving at 8am, and i will be running by then. and must sleep amidst loud sounds of the nightclub that is my hostel.

brief sf update

Sat, 30 Jul 2005 05:50:40 GMT

soo in san francisco now. yesterday was: got to hostel, had six-person room all to myself, figured out BART system (i.e. metro). lunch at outdoor french cafe, caffe claude, downtown where chatted with guy from paris. went to free cuban concert in union square. went back to hostel and discovered that hostel is part of a cafe/restaurant/bar/nightclub with an outdoor rooftop bar with an amazing view. don't know what it's called, starts with an "M", but the writing is in archaic cursive and i'm too lazy to figure it out.

me being who i am, i went to the bar, ordered a mojito with mint leaves and read my book on morman fundamentalists...

until a woman asked me what i was reading and invited me to join her and her guy friend at their rooftop table. ate some hummus, joined them. seven crazy locals. chatted for a while, went to another bar (lazlo's) directly on the other side of my hostel, and then went to another bar ON SUPER FAST GUY'S MOTORCYLE (amy's cheap thrill of the day) called lucky 13.

today: not as nuts as yesterday, more of the chilling/relaxing thing i would eventually wind up doing if i lived here (or anywhere). massive bookstores, went to berkeley. immensely jealous of beautiful campus. ate at a bustling cafe with the biggest salads i have ever laid eyes on. attempted to not spend money. failed and bought two books, one of which i then spent an hour or two reading at another cafe in north beach, caffe treiste. visited another bookstore, city lights, where i bought one of those bags. you know, the kind that either strange bohemian women wear, or teachers. the side bag, generally khaki covered and coffee stained, filled with books. except mine is black, says 'city lights bookstore, san francisco' on it, and is much cooler because worn by me.

tonight: ?